Oops-We Taxed You Again-Proposed 32% Tax on Internet Devices for Kids

Oops-We Taxed You Again-Proposed 32% Tax on Internet Devices for Kids

Michigan’s proposed 32% sin device tax on top of convience fees, service fees, credit card fees, transaction fees, fraud fees, waste fees, percentage fees, etc.

Michigan lawmakers have rolled out a proposal to spank you with a 32% tax on internet‑connected devices “marketed to or primarily used by minors.” The stated goal is to curb youth tech addiction. The unstated reality is that parents — who already can’t discipline their kids without someone calling CPS — are now expected to pay hundreds more for the privilege of being blamed for everything anyway.

Supporters say it’s about protecting children. Critics say it’s about punishing families who are already out of tools, out of leverage, and out of patience.

What about educational devices that use the internet?

WTF is Happening?

A new Michigan House bill proposes a massive excise tax on smartphones, tablets, gaming consoles, and anything else with a Wi‑Fi chip that a kid might breathe near. The revenue would fund mental‑health and anti‑addiction programs.

Who’s Involved?

  • Michigan legislators, who seem convinced that a tax can do what modern parenting laws no longer allow.
  • Parents, who can’t take a phone away without being accused of “emotional abuse.”
  • Retailers, now expected to determine whether a device is “for kids” or just “for adults who like cartoons.”
  • Tech companies, who will pretend to be shocked.
  • Advocacy groups, some cheering, some horrified, all very loud.

Is The Real Issue: Parenting With No Power?

This bill dances around the actual problem: Kids have unlimited access to technology because parents have been stripped of the ability to enforce boundaries.

Modern parenting looks like this:

  • Take the phone away → “You’re abusive.”
  • Limit screen time → “You’re controlling.”
  • Say no to TikTok → “You’re harming their social development.”
  • Ask them to go outside → “You’re endangering them.”

So lawmakers, instead of addressing the cultural and legal erosion of parental authority, decided to… add a 32% tax.

It’s like watching a house burn down and responding by raising the price of fire extinguishers.

How the Scam Would Work

  • A 32% excise tax on:
    • Smartphones
    • Tablets
    • Laptops
    • Gaming consoles
    • Smartwatches
    • Basically anything that isn’t a toaster
  • Applies when the device is “marketed to or primarily used by minors,” which is vague enough to include half of Best Buy.
  • Retailers must determine applicability — because nothing says “economic stability” like turning cashiers into forensic analysts.
  • Revenue goes to:
    • Youth mental‑health programs
    • Tech‑addiction research
    • Safety initiatives

What’s in your Wallet?

It’s gonna be a lot less

  • Affordability: A $300 device becomes $396. A $1,000 device becomes $1,320. 
  • Digital equity: Wealthier families shrug. Everyone else suffers.
  • Youth mental health: Funding is good — but taxing families is not a strategy.
  • Parental authority: Continues to erode while lawmakers pretend the problem is “insufficient taxation.”
  • Legal challenges: The bill may collide with commerce rules and basic logic.

Outlook

Expect:

  • Heated hearings
  • Lobbyists swarming
  • Parents showing up with stories lawmakers don’t want to hear
  • Amendments trying to make the bill less absurd

This proposal will almost certainly change — the question is whether it will improve or just become a more expensive version of the same idea.

Here’s the links

HB 5496 of 2026

House Bill Taxation: excise taxes; excise tax on the purchase of wireless communications devices; require for purchases of devices primarily for the use of individuals under 18 years of age. Creates new act.

 

Sponsors

Here’s something else

FAQ

1. Does the tax apply to all devices?

Only those “marketed to or primarily used by minors,” which is vague enough to include half the electronics aisle.

2. How much extra will families pay?

A lot. Enough to make you reconsider whether your kid really needs a device or can just learn semaphore.

3. Where does the money go?

Mental‑health programs, addiction research, and tech‑safety initiatives — all good things, funded in a questionable way.

4. Could this end up in court?

Very likely. Lawyers are already circling like sharks that smell legislative blood.

5. Is Michigan the first state to try this?

Yes. And depending on how it goes, possibly the last.

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